kiramaru7 | Cross-posted from Hentai Contest...

Title: Overwhelming Awesomeness
Fandom: Hetalia
Author: kira
Chars/Pairs: Prussia, Germany, mention of Hungary and Austria
Genres: general
Warnings: none
Word Count: 666
Summary: Prussia tells Germany about how his awesomeness came about
Author’s note: Special thanks to my beta, Jen, for looking this over for me…

For Kat who gave me a challenge and the following quote:
"Believe it or not, once upon a time I was not as awesome as I now am..." Barney on “How I met your Mother.”

“Believe it or not, once upon a time I was not as awesome as I now am…” Prussia said. He picked up his stein and drank. He swallowed, the corner of his mouth pulling upwards in his trademark smirk.

Germany’s eyes widened at that little revelation as he drank his beer, but he said nothing. This could go one of two ways, either his brother was going to tell him a crock of horse shit and never let him live it down that he believed every word, or he was going to be completely honest with him. He waited to see where things would go as ordered another round.

Prussia waited until the barmaid left, before continuing with his tale. “It was back when I was a ‘Teutonic Knight.’ I had a great time fighting and all, and there was this other lil Fatzke of a country that sometimes fought alongside me.” His smirk softened into a fond smile as he relived those memories in his head.

Germany snorted. He bit into the big soft pretzel the Biergarten was famous for and ate it. He reached for his stein and washed it down with a mouthful of beer. “Don’t tell me, Hungary kicked your arsch back then.”

“Actually, she did better than that.”

“Yeah?”

Prussia nodded. “She completely overwhelmed me. I mean I had always suspected something wasn’t quite right…” He paused to drink his beer. “Back then she used to pretend, or think she was, a boy.”

“She’s made no secret of that, Brüder.”

“Anyway, one day …” Prussia could not help smiling, “she was acting like she was sick, which wasn’t cool. We were battling off and on with… it could have been Ottoman Empire. I forget.” He frowned. “Anyway, she told me her chest felt funny and it hurt. So, being the awesome guy that I am,” Prussia grinned as his brother chuckled into his beer, “I reached out and massaged his chest and I say 'his,' cuz at the time, I thought Hungary was a guy.”

Germany nearly choked on his beer. “You didn’t!” he sputtered.

“I sure did and I got the biggest shock of my life. Moving into Russia’s house was nothing compared to that.”

“Really?”

Prussia nodded. “Then only thing that tops that,” he paused to drink his beer, “Was getting a glimpse of her boobs, after she had grown them.”

Germany laughed.

“That, kleine Brüder, was even more overwhelming. She was wounded, so being-”

“The awesome guy that you are-”

“I insisted I take care of her injury. I remember ripping the front of my uniform off as a makeshift bandage, giving her a nice view of my package.”

“I’m sure it was,” Germany said dryly as he shook his head.

“That seemed to get her, but she laughed it off and then got me right back with a nice view of her cleavage. Mein Gott…” Prussia sighed. “ And of course I stood at attention.” He winked.

Germany laughed. “Brüder, you’re lucky she didn’t kick your arsch.”

Prussia also laughed. “Tell me about it! I was stunned at the time, cuz by then I had had centuries of monastic living under my belt.”

The two brothers laughed and finished their beers. Prussia called the barmaid over for another round. While they waited for her to bring them their beers, he continued with his story. “And then we kinda went our separate ways,” he shot his brother a rueful look, “and while I went on to become the awesome guy you see today, she married that prissy old fool. Still… it wasn’t as bad as it could have been.”

“Yeah?” Germany asked.

Prussia nodded. “I invaded his vital regions! It was awesome too!”

Germany laughed. “And that I guess is the start of your awesomeness?”

“Nah… Don’t tell her, but I started being awesome the minute I felt her up.” Prussia winked.

Germany chuckled as he shook his head. “I thought you were overwhelmed.”

Prussia smirked. “That too!”