*sighs*

[kiramaru7]

kira needs a break from all the nonsense that's been going on around here. As of now, I'm not going to eb writing for any of the contest comms I belong. I've heard too many stories about funkiness with the voting that's taken the joy out of winning the few times that I did.

I feel a deep depression coming on, cuz my writing is getting darker & more angsty, and as a result I'm not enjoying it as much. And what's worse, I can't believe how many people can't be bothered to reciprocate with comments. Not that I'm a review whore, although it sounds like it, but I took the time to read their stuff & leave a comment, yet all I seem to get is a thank you, if I'm lucky and nothing else, as if it's okay to spend my time but not theirs. As a result I don't feel like commenting at all now or reading anything or even participating any more.

I feel meh... mostly because I'm tired of the wankage, tired of the politics & arse kissing, tired of people thinking they're better than everyone else & starting crap because of it & just plain tired... So I'm going to be selfish & go solo for a while. It's the only way I know of to deal with all the crap around here...

Comments

[mythnlynx.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm sorry if I've been among the guilty. It's been a stressful couple of weeks, with some health and injury issues (don't ask, I feel like a stupid klutz). I haven't even thanked anyone who commented on my last iyhed entry, nor have I commented on any fic recently. I feel like a real heel when I read how sad it's making you and tasuki to get minimal feedback.

I can certainly understand the urge to pull back and reevaluate, especially if there has been wankery occurring. I've been lucky to only be party to the vaguest of rumors, but if voting is in question at some comms, it makes you wonder if you should enter. We all want our writing to be judged on its merits.

Also, at this time of year, when it's Winter for most of us, I know I get the urge to hibernate and just not deal anymore, so it can be tough to reach out.

I just wanted you to know that I do consider you a friend, albeit a very new one, and that I do enjoy your writing. I hope that you will continue writing and posting for your own pleasure, and that you will continue to share with us, even if its not for a contest comm.

[kiramaru7.livejournal.com]

*huggles* You're not amongst the guilty & I understand peopel get sick & RL interfers, what I'm upset about are the peopel that I read their stuff, & I get a thank you & maybe a further comment or two, but they never come by & read anything I write. Is it because I haven't friended or what? That's what upset me & tasuki as well. It's very discouraging to when I give feedback & get nothing in return. Granted I'm not writing the msot popular pairing out there, & expecting a 1 for 1 feedback deal is probably asking too much from these peopel, but it would be nice if they commented on 1 thing I did.

I, thankfully ahven't been involved with wankage, but I've things & it really spoils it & puts a downer on something I enjoy. Like maybe I only got this awrad because they wanted to look like things are "fair" not becasue I earned it with my writing. Plus I don't knw how true what's being said is and that bothers me too. The whole is liek being abck in Middle school & high school & I hated school for thsoe reasons. And then there's the whole "I cna't be friends with you ebciase you're friends with them" crap. And that's got me feeling really depressed. So I need tos tep back & just write again becasue I want to, not because I need to get a fci done before this date, & then wondering why it didn't palce when it got nice comments, or when it does did I win fairly or not. *sighs* I'm getting a headache again just thinking about it.

This lack of comments, which I see as a lack of repsect from fellow authors, has been going on for a while, it's not just because it's winter & people just want to hibernate. It's a "I just can't be bother, because you're not as cool as I am" attitude, which leads to tons of wankage.

Thank you, you're one of my frineds here & hopefully we can get to knwo each better or as well as you cna online. I love your writing & I'll happily read it & comment too. I'm going to keep sharing & writing for myself. I might write for the contest prompts, but I'm going to do so for myself on my own tiem with no pressure.

[mythnlynx.livejournal.com]

I, for one, really love your pairing! ♥

Jakotsu is such a twisted little prick, and he and Bankotsu both deserve more love! I always enjoy your fics, even when I don't comment.^_^

Yeah, I get what you're saying about the general ass-hattery that goes on online. I encountered it on another comm (NOT an IY comm), where it took the moderator stepping in and deleting offensive comments because this girl got nasty, bigoted, and derogatory towards something I said. Some people hide behind the relative anonymity of the internet to get away with stuff they never would in real life, stuff my mother would knock me on my ass for if I every tried it!

And while most writers have big egos (myself included, to some extent), unless you're getting PAID, I don't feel any of us have the right to a better-than-thou attitude. (Professionals can't always help it, many of them think their own shit doesn't stink. And Sensei is a BIG EXCEPTION to this--I don't think I've ever met a more humble, likable published author before!) I really don't think there's ANY excuse for bad behavior, this is supposed to be for entertainment, first and foremost.

I'm glad to be getting to know you, and I'm so happy to hear that you won't let this nonsense keep you from writing altogether! I would hate to see you squelch your talent due to the hurtful behavior of a few inconsiderate assholes. *HUGS*

[kiramaru7.livejournal.com]

*blushes* thanks!

*nods* I knwo... I think that's why I love him so much. That & his math skills! *laughs* I cna sooo relate to them. ;p

*nods* And very few fics out there with them in it. I think about half of them on ff.net have my name after them. ^^; And one of the really good authors that worte stopped. T.T

That's oaky... *huggles* You've been sick.

*growls* I'm sooo tired of the stupidity & immaturity that rears its ugly head every so oftne liek now. I've had some idiot sic their fantrolls on me at a comm, not here, but I was being harassed on my own personal email, becasue I said that particualr author had won enough & it was tiem to get some new blood. I feel if a chapter fic won soemthing once that's it, it should not be up for anything e;se no matter hwo many chapters the author adds to it. Unless there was a catagory for best serial, which means they update every month, then if it came in thrid, that's it. Now second chance to come in 1st next tiem. I knwo & that's what;'s so appuling that soem peoepl feel amnnors don't count on the net. I believe in treating peoepl the smae way I'd liek to be treated, with respect & politeness.

yes, we're all proud of our babies, but some peopel ahve an overinflated sense of importance in grand scheme of thinsg. ;p Excatly! And eevn if one si getting paid for it, that's no excuse for such rude behavior. I love Sensei too. She's very sweet & cool too!

Same here! I've decided that the shit stops here! People can dump whatecver crap they wnat, but I'm not repeating or acting on it. They can be inconsiderate arsefardles, & I'm going to try not to let that get to me. I'm going to go play with my boys now... ;p (I have a fic that needs finsihing.. ;P)

[mythnlynx.livejournal.com]

arsefardles LOL!

I think this is my new favorite term!

[kiramaru7.livejournal.com]

Thank you! ;D I made that up all by myself. ;p Feel free to use it at will. ;p